Dear Edward - Ann Napolitano

When I was in undergrad and had recently changed my major from chemistry to English, I took a creative writing class where a guest speaker read a short story of her about a plane crash. It was 2002 and she noted she'd probably never get the story published given the events of 9/11. I thought about this a lot when I picked up this book for the first time. There are young adults now who were not alive on 9/11 and perhaps this type of story doesn't feel as jarring for them. But there was something about this story that was deeply sad and unsettling for me.

But that's not to say that the book wasn't well written or worth reading. It was. But wading through individual trauma through the lens of national trauma of 9/11 was uncomfortable.

Dear Edward tells the story of a plane crash. 12 yo Edward Adler and his family are moving from New York City to Los Angeles where his mother is taking on a job writing for a TV show and his father is moving to a new university to be a professor after losing his bid for tenure. Along the way they meet several other passengers going through their own minor dramas.

And then the plane crashes. And Edward is the only survivor. To say that his life is completely changed is a drastic understatement. The PTSD alone is immense. Survivor's guilt. Orphan. He goes to live with his aunt and uncle who could never have kids of their own. But he's not ready to be folded into a family. And all this makes sense. Edward's reaction to everything is detailed and nothing seems out of the question.

The book alternates between Edward's life after the crash, and the hours and minutes leading up to the crash itself. This led to some confusion on my part since I was listening to the audio book and it interrupted the flow of the story somewhat. The actual events in the cockpit were lifted from an actual crash and that somehow makes the entire thing terrifying. Eventually Edward starts to process his trauma and one of the things that helps him is finding a trove of letters written to him by family members of those on the plane. Corresponding with these people feels cathartic for him. And in a way, it's cathartic for the reader as well.

4/5 Stars. 

The Gift of Fear: Survival Signals That Protect Us from Violence - Gavin de Becker

This short book was terrifying and enlightening and in the end, somehow comforting. We are all gifted with an inherent ability to sense and react to real threats. Not the uneasy feeling we get in a little airline turbulence, but the visceral (gut) reaction we feel when we are in the presence of real danger. The Gift of Fear tells us to listen to that voice. 

Whether or not we listen to this feeling can be the difference between life and death. de Becker introduces many scenarios of people who have listened or not listened to this voice. And most of these scenarios are terrifying. Ask yourself, he says, what is the worst thing you can ever imagine one human could do to another? And then, he says, rest assured that that thing, that thing that you can only imagine has been done to someone somewhere in the world. And that thought sends chills through my body. Man's capacity for cruelty is only limited by the imagination. And most often the target of those limits are children. Which, is the most horrifying and unpardonable fact I have ever encountered.

So, I'm glad I read this book, because keeping myself and my children safe may (hopefully not) be necessary sometime. May I never let politeness, social norms, or societal expectations override my natural instincts to react to fear.

4/5 Stars.